“The Manifest of a Model Frontiersman”
Folks of all shapes and sizes make their way to the frontier. Now, I don’t know if it’s the rugged terrain or the inevitable sting of a scorpion, but everyone quickly starts to look the part once they make it out this way. Take a look at our model, Guston, to get a sense of what I mean.
Guston used to sell shoes in one of the bigger cities on the East Coast–Philadelphia, I think. That life wasn’t for him, so he came West for a new start. And a new start he did find.
Featuring some of our (work-in-progress) garb, Guston epitomizes the new life we live out here: battle-ready and dressed to kill. With a wide variety of attire options, Guston fits himself for any combustive occasion he may need to attend.
This is what you can expect to look like, dear reader, when you too finally head out West and join us in the upcoming battle royale, WANTED: Dead Men Walking.
Our team has focused their talent into making sure the men and women of the West will shine like the summer sun. We want you to look every bit of the part when you embody our fighters. Guston is but one of many, many, many folks you’ll come to know as you place their hat on your head and prepare for battle.
The customization options will be flush, believe you me. Sure, the goal is to take home victory as the last man standing, but there’s only one way victory is done right. It’s by looking damn good when you’re achieving it.
Down the line, we’ll have more of our fighters step in front of the fancy photo-taking device so you can get a feel for the rest of them. This might have to wait, however, because when the flash went off on the photo-taker, I screamed with fright and slammed the demonic thing to the ground. It’s currently under repairs.
According to my handlers, my privileges to operate our modern equipment has hereby been revoked. I’ll stick to my writing, I suppose.
Ike “Inkblot” Brewster
Editor-in-Chief, The Pony Express